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Huskerh8er is the Shack resident expert on Apple.....
Posted on: January 15, 2025 at 17:50:08 CT
Tigrrrr! MU
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259039
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23.21 yrs
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M.O.B. Votes:
2
So yesterday, the home button on my iPhone4 just stops working. A MILDLY important feature, so I start the process of getting it fixed. Good news, I am still under warranty, and my phone will be replaced for free. Sounds great. Problem? I have to go to the Apple Store to do it.
No worries, I'll just swing by at lunch. So as I'm getting ready to swing by, a co-worker tells me, "better make an appointment". An appointment? To fix my phone? Are they going to put it on jacks or something? So I call up these clowns (after looking for the local store number for an hour) and the little d0uche on the phone tells me I need to go to the apple website to get a time. OK Fine.
I go to the apple site and whew...27 open timeslots are available. I make my reservation for 12:10 and figure 15 minutes to the apple store, 10-15 minutes in line and 15 minutes back will get me back in the office for my 1pm meeting. Sounds easy right? No, not easy.
Apparently the much hipper-than-me folks at Apple do things a little differently. First of all....NO LINE. There are probably 250 people packed into the size of a standard ranch style basement. People are EVERYWHERE. Some are talking on phones, some are looking at stuff on the walls. But there is no semblance of a line ANYWHERE. No "Server #__ next" sign. No placards that tell me where to stand. NOTHING. Just float around and try and figure things out.
Eventually, this fruity little dork in a blue shirt comes up to me with his iPad and asks me if I have an appointment. FINALLY. Yes...i have an appointment for 10 minutes ago. He punches up imaginary numbers in his machine thing and says, "OK, somebody will be with you shortly"...and then leaves.
So let me get this straight...Apple is nice enough to replace my phone, but too cool for things like queue lines, announcements or signs of any kind. So as I'm waiting for SOMEOBDY to come help me, I'm nearly stampeded by 10-15 different nerds in blue shirts every 10 seconds or so...basically pushing me out of their way as they walk back and fourth with arms full of boxes of products...most likely empty to look important.
THIRTY minutes later, some dude who looks like Ben Harper walks up and goes, "Can I help you?". I say yes, my phone is busted. "Did you hvae an appointment?" I TOLD LITTLE CONNOR OBERST over there I had an appointment and he said OK. What the f*CK is he doing on that iPad he's carrying around? What's the point of "checking" people in?
So Ben harber takes out his magic iPhone pocket knife...(as we stand in the middle of the store with 900,000 people bumping into us) and then starts popping pieces out of the thing. "OK, I'll be right back". At this point, I'm already late for my meeting...but I can't TELL anybody because Ben Harper HAS MY F*CKING PHONE in pieces in his hand.
10 minutes later, I look over and Ben is chatting with some 17 year old chicks holding a macbook. Now I get being 23 years old or so...and if some chick is waiting ahead of my 40 year old ass..I help her as well. I get it. But THIRTY MORE minutes later, dude is still helping her out. I walk over to him, give him a glance and he gives me the "one second" hand gesture. TEN MORE minutes and several bruises later, some butch looking woman in a blue shirt asks me if I've been helped. "Yes" I say..."that dude there, but it's been a while". She whips out an iPad and goes, "Did you have an appointment?"
I MADE A F*CKING APPOINTMENT....WHY DO YOU KEEP ASKING ME THAT YOU F**KING IDIOT TREE-HUGGING ASSH0LES!?!?
Ben is finally done making chit chat with hot high school girl and swings back by. "Did they take care of you?" They? WHO THE F*CK is "they"? You mean Dave Matthews over here with the earrings? or the guy in the blue shirt wearing a F*CKING STOCKING CAP indoors when it's 50 degrees out? NO Ben...I haven't been helped.
Walks back behind the Genius bar (Don't get me started on those guys), unplugs a phone and goes, "Oh. Here you go. Thanks"
Done.
If this is the way a simple trip to the store is going to go in the future, you may as well pump about 6 slugs into my forehead because I will snap like a twig if I ever have to deal with that sh*t again anytime soon.
Phone works like a champ now though.
No worries, I'll just swing by at lunch. So as I'm getting ready to swing by, a co-worker tells me, "better make an appointment". An appointment? To fix my phone? Are they going to put it on jacks or something? So I call up these clowns (after looking for the local store number for an hour) and the little d0uche on the phone tells me I need to go to the apple website to get a time. OK Fine.
I go to the apple site and whew...27 open timeslots are available. I make my reservation for 12:10 and figure 15 minutes to the apple store, 10-15 minutes in line and 15 minutes back will get me back in the office for my 1pm meeting. Sounds easy right? No, not easy.
Apparently the much hipper-than-me folks at Apple do things a little differently. First of all....NO LINE. There are probably 250 people packed into the size of a standard ranch style basement. People are EVERYWHERE. Some are talking on phones, some are looking at stuff on the walls. But there is no semblance of a line ANYWHERE. No "Server #__ next" sign. No placards that tell me where to stand. NOTHING. Just float around and try and figure things out.
Eventually, this fruity little dork in a blue shirt comes up to me with his iPad and asks me if I have an appointment. FINALLY. Yes...i have an appointment for 10 minutes ago. He punches up imaginary numbers in his machine thing and says, "OK, somebody will be with you shortly"...and then leaves.
So let me get this straight...Apple is nice enough to replace my phone, but too cool for things like queue lines, announcements or signs of any kind. So as I'm waiting for SOMEOBDY to come help me, I'm nearly stampeded by 10-15 different nerds in blue shirts every 10 seconds or so...basically pushing me out of their way as they walk back and fourth with arms full of boxes of products...most likely empty to look important.
THIRTY minutes later, some dude who looks like Ben Harper walks up and goes, "Can I help you?". I say yes, my phone is busted. "Did you hvae an appointment?" I TOLD LITTLE CONNOR OBERST over there I had an appointment and he said OK. What the f*CK is he doing on that iPad he's carrying around? What's the point of "checking" people in?
So Ben harber takes out his magic iPhone pocket knife...(as we stand in the middle of the store with 900,000 people bumping into us) and then starts popping pieces out of the thing. "OK, I'll be right back". At this point, I'm already late for my meeting...but I can't TELL anybody because Ben Harper HAS MY F*CKING PHONE in pieces in his hand.
10 minutes later, I look over and Ben is chatting with some 17 year old chicks holding a macbook. Now I get being 23 years old or so...and if some chick is waiting ahead of my 40 year old ass..I help her as well. I get it. But THIRTY MORE minutes later, dude is still helping her out. I walk over to him, give him a glance and he gives me the "one second" hand gesture. TEN MORE minutes and several bruises later, some butch looking woman in a blue shirt asks me if I've been helped. "Yes" I say..."that dude there, but it's been a while". She whips out an iPad and goes, "Did you have an appointment?"
I MADE A F*CKING APPOINTMENT....WHY DO YOU KEEP ASKING ME THAT YOU F**KING IDIOT TREE-HUGGING ASSH0LES!?!?
Ben is finally done making chit chat with hot high school girl and swings back by. "Did they take care of you?" They? WHO THE F*CK is "they"? You mean Dave Matthews over here with the earrings? or the guy in the blue shirt wearing a F*CKING STOCKING CAP indoors when it's 50 degrees out? NO Ben...I haven't been helped.
Walks back behind the Genius bar (Don't get me started on those guys), unplugs a phone and goes, "Oh. Here you go. Thanks"
Done.
If this is the way a simple trip to the store is going to go in the future, you may as well pump about 6 slugs into my forehead because I will snap like a twig if I ever have to deal with that sh*t again anytime soon.
Phone works like a champ now though.
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Huskerh8er is the Shack resident expert on Apple..... - Tigrrrr! MU - 1/15 17:50:08