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"You won’t sketch them and I won’t Mace them"

Posted on: September 19, 2024 at 13:54:44 CT
colonel angus beef KC
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made me laugh out loud

“Look, Ralph,” I said. “Let’s not kid ourselves. That was a very horrible drawing you gave him. It was the face of a monster. It got on his nerves very badly.” I shrugged. “Why in the hell do you think we left the restaurant so fast?”

“I thought it was because of the Mace,” he said.

“What Mace?”

He grinned. “When you shot it at the headwaiter, don’t you remember?”10

“Hell, that was nothing,” I said. “I missed him … and we were leaving, anyway.”

“But it got all over us,” he said. “The room was full of that damn gas. Your brother was sneezing and his wife was crying. My eyes hurt for two hours. I couldn’t see to draw when we got back to the motel.”

“That’s right,” I said. “The stuff got on her leg, didn’t it?”

“She was angry,” he said.

“Yah … well, okay … let’s just figure we f*cked up about equally on that one,” I said. “But from now on let’s try to be careful when we’re around people I know. You won’t sketch them and I won’t Mace them. We’ll just try to relax and get drunk.”

“Right,” he said. “We’ll go native.”

Edited by colonel angus beef at 13:55:00 on 09/19/24
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MESSAGE THREAD

Picture the day care owner charged with child abuse - MizzouAstro MU - 9/19 13:39:12
     you'd have to be a meth head to leave you kid with - alwaysright MU - 9/20 09:06:13
     "It took her a long time to enter the building because she - XRob MU - 9/19 16:25:17
     I pictured some woman with a tatted-up boyfriend who is - tigerNkc KC - 9/19 15:49:40
     Hooters girl in Moberly Mo. (nm) - tigerdb MU - 9/19 14:33:21
          A Moberly 8. (nm) - mizzou john MU - 9/19 14:36:51
               Ballsac Face could clean up in Moberly(nm) - cnk ATL - 9/19 14:44:06
                    where the **** is Wildcat to give us a Ballsac Face update? - MizzouAstro MU - 9/19 15:07:55
                    so could MacGranttttttt(nm) - Fire Marshall Bill A - 9/19 14:47:17
                         I'll say(nm) - meatiger MU - 9/19 14:54:33
               Hate to see what a Moberly zero looks like(nm) - meatiger MU - 9/19 14:37:30
                    literally a 5-gallon bucket of vomit - Joeboo MU - 9/19 14:39:18
                         RE: literally a 5-gallon bucket of vomit - meatiger MU - 9/19 14:41:20
     A Google image search for "Naomi Hess" doesn't disappioint. - AllThingsKC KC - 9/19 14:14:57
          that was traumatic(nm) - cnk ATL - 9/19 14:30:21
          RE: A Google image search for "Naomi Hess" doesn't disappioint. - meatiger MU - 9/19 14:16:30
               "tell 'em Large Marge sent ya"(nm) - cnk ATL - 9/19 14:31:00
                    [I get that reference gif] - colonel angus beef KC - 9/19 19:06:59
               what a bunch of Quasimodos(nm) - Joeboo MU - 9/19 14:23:44
          WTF that name is like a guaranteed DNA bonanza - colonel angus beef KC - 9/19 14:15:58
     is she related to Mike Parsons? - Joeboo MU - 9/19 14:13:47
     three kids of her own - meatiger MU - 9/19 14:12:03
          maybe not. Maybe she had a litter(nm) - Joeboo MU - 9/19 14:12:59
               so just once - meatiger MU - 9/19 14:14:12
               maybe they flew off her shoulder like cloverfield monster - colonel angus beef KC - 9/19 14:14:11
     generative ai is getting pretty amazing (nm) - phrejd KC - 9/19 14:00:17
          more like degenerative(nm) - meatiger MU - 9/19 14:11:13
               heyooo (nm) - phrejd KC - 9/19 15:30:34
     So bluesox's wife is a child abuser??? - Carlos Rossi KC - 9/19 13:50:36
     looks like a Dick Tracy villian(nm) - TigerA MU - 9/19 13:47:21
          **** lol(nm) - cnk ATL - 9/19 14:28:30
          looks like laqueefs mangled dick in character form(nm) - Joeboo MU - 9/19 13:50:27
               and then that character was put in Pans Labrynth - colonel angus beef KC - 9/19 13:56:45
               So Sloth from Goonies did procreate. Interesting.(nm) - Carlos Rossi KC - 9/19 13:53:51
                    he was raped(nm) - MizzouAstro MU - 9/19 13:56:55
                         RE: he was raped(nm) - colonel angus beef KC - 9/19 13:58:31
                    he did play at MU too so it's possible....(nm) - TigerA MU - 9/19 13:55:34
                    Sloth + Lizzie Velasquez - Joeboo MU - 9/19 13:55:25
                         don't threaten me with a good time(nm) - MizzouAstro MU - 9/19 14:04:08
     is that a pic or a portrait by salvador dali - colonel angus beef KC - 9/19 13:46:20
          Yes, but as he is now (nm) - SatoriTiger JC - 9/19 13:46:45
               RE: Yes, but as he is now (nm) - colonel angus beef KC - 9/19 13:50:30
                    "You won’t sketch them and I won’t Mace them" - colonel angus beef KC - 9/19 13:54:44
                         You think I'm reading your Dali fan fiction? - SatoriTiger JC - 9/19 13:56:49
     holy sh*t she's only 27? - Joeboo MU - 9/19 13:44:20
          Moberly meth. (nm) - mizzou john MU - 9/19 14:35:06
          That and she doesn't look like a Naomi, she looks more - playhard KC - 9/19 13:57:13
          Maybe they forget a 1? (nm) - SatoriTiger JC - 9/19 13:49:36
          My thoughts exactly - mu7176grad MU - 9/19 13:48:26
               Not sure there was ever a "not ugly" part of her(nm) - meatiger MU - 9/19 14:02:53
                    thats a delighfully brutal sentence to say to someone - colonel angus beef KC - 9/19 14:07:08
               got ugly? - MizzouAstro MU - 9/19 13:54:46
                    in the moon forest of Ugly - colonel angus beef KC - 9/19 13:59:43
          she's melting(nm) - MizzouAstro MU - 9/19 13:45:23
               looks like a bad Salvador Dali painting(nm) - Joeboo MU - 9/19 13:46:18
                    whew, you almost got ph'd twice in one thread(nm) - TigerA MU - 9/19 13:48:36
                         2 seconds - colonel angus beef KC - 9/19 13:55:21
     Not a 1. Negative 1.(nm) - AWOLTiger KC - 9/19 13:43:51
     Bluesox has definitely hit that(nm) - Joeboo MU - 9/19 13:43:13
          get that weight up boi!(nm) - Fire Marshall Bill A - 9/19 13:44:38
     bluesox hit it(nm) - Fire Marshall Bill A - 9/19 13:42:58
          goddamnit(nm) - Joeboo MU - 9/19 13:43:20
               double damnit.(nm) - Carlos Rossi KC - 9/19 13:51:12
                    RE: double damnit.(nm) - Fire Marshall Bill A - 9/19 14:09:55




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