I am thinking either a Mizzou or Arkansas player, possibly

Posted on: February 15, 2017 at 09:29:02 CT

A&M due to geography. She is definitely geting boned by the other dude. Anonymous Mailbag

My girlfriend and I have been dating for several months now. This is not a relatively long time, but it is enough to know that this girl is an absolute catch and that she is wife material. She has also expressed to me that she would want to marry me down the road. For the past two months, we have been doing the long distance relationship deal which is new for both of us. I play football at a SEC school and she is in a sorority at a Big 12 school.

Her sorority does a formal later in the year that I will not be able to attend since my team will have our spring game on that day. She was telling me that it was socially acceptable to ask a different guy to this formal if your boyfriend is not able to attend. Now I am obviously not a fan of this idea. I have lightly expressed my dislike of this idea to her, but she insists that there is nothing to worry about. She has done nothing so far to make me not trust her. She has a flirtatious personality and I know how college guys work (especially when alcohol is involved). I don't want to make this a big deal and come off as a controlling dick to have her make me the bad guy in this situation. At the same time, I don't want to be passive and not say anything to let this slide (#dbap).

How do I talk her out of taking another guy without coming off as the bad guy? Is it naive of me to just trust her with another guy? What's my play here?"

First of all, if you play football at an SEC school and you have a girlfriend at another school the only thing I can think is that this girl must be the smokeshow of all smokeshows.

But I'd still advise you, like I advise all college guys, not to have a serious girlfriend in college because when you're 36 years old and married you're going to be thinking back on all the girls in college you wish you'd hooked up with, but didn't. But that's for you to discover in the future. I'm just the old dude here guaranteeing that at some point in time you will be where all married guys are, thinking back on the girls you wish you'd hooked up with when you were single.

Selfishly I want a top SEC athlete to make the decision that he wants to have as much crazy sex on campus as possible and then write a tell all book about the experience. Like, for instance, what if Matthew Stafford was a total poonhound, was funny, and wrote an incredible tell all book about all the sex he had while quarterback at Georgia. Tell me you wouldn't drop everything to read that book. How about the time Jamal Lewis had sex with nine different girls at the same time? (I just made up this story, but I'm convinced it happened). That's the SEC Storied I want to watch or read.

By the way, I've totally pitched Matt Leinart on writing this book. His stories are incredible. Can you imagine being a good looking dude at the helm of the USC dynasty in LA when they had no NFL team and then getting drafted top ten and moving to freaking Scottsdale, Arizona? You can make a strong argument that Leinart was surrounded by more hot ass than any quarterback in football history.

Okay, back to your question: if your girlfriend is really hot and she takes a guy to her sorority formal there is a 100% chance that the guy will be wanting to hook up with her. You know this, I know this, every guy reading this knows this. Moreover that guy's already thinking about hooking up with her even when he's playing the, "Of course, we're just friends!" angle. Now chances are the kind of guy who goes to a sorority formal with a girl he's friends with when that girl has a boyfriend is kind of a pussy, but toss in alcohol, your girlfriend being dressed up hotter than normal and the usual sorority formal shenanigans and it's totally feasible that she could hook up with this dude.

I'm not saying she will do it, but I'm saying it's perfectly normal for you to think she might and the guy she is going with will definitely hook up with her if he gets the chance. So this is entirely her call.

Now hot girls are different than dudes because guys are always trying to hook up with them all day long every day. The only male comparison has to be what it's like to be a starting quarterback at a football school or what Ryan Gosling's life is like in Hollywood today. There are like .001% of dudes who have any clue what this feeling would be like, for women trying to be banging you everywhere you go. So whereas virtually all men have to work pretty hard for sex, hot girls live with an ever present reality -- they can pretty much have sex whenever they want with whomever they want.

So here's what I would request -- does your girlfriend have a gay friend she could go to the formal with? This is the perfect occasion for you to champion a gay friend date. Then he gets to dress up and party and you have no worries whatsoever that she's going to get drunk and hook up with him. As an added bonus you seem really gallant and progressive for making the suggestion.

If she doesn't have a gay friend, why can't you bring her to town for the spring game? Wouldn't most girls rather watch their boyfriends play in an SEC spring game than go to a sorority formal?

If she doesn't have a gay friend and she doesn't want to come to the spring game, I don't think you have many options left. You have to be cool with her going to her formal without you and trust her not to hook up with the dude she's going with. Yes, the dude you know is definitely hoping the girl will hook up with him.

I just don't think you can forbid her from taking a date if everyone else has a date.

I know it seems like a really tough spot right now because you're in college and you think this girl is the one for you, but trust me on this -- you really don't have much to lose here. If she hooks up with him then you break up with her and are a single football player on an SEC campus. If she doesn't hook up with him, then you have even more evidence that she might be the right girl for you.

Good luck.